he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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