Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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