just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
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