How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
