how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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