Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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