Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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