There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
