After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
They are going to name an STD after you.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Randomize
