there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
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