3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
