is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Are we still banned from the library?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
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