her vagine was all disorganized.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize