I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
