You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Randomize
