Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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