I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
