what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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