Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
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