its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
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