what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize