don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
