i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I stole a fireplace last night.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
