We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
where does the pee come out of this thing
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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