You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
