In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
