It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
