i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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