well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
