yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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