it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
