So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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