Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize