Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Randomize
