I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
