wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
