I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
