you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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