TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
