Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
