i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
