I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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