First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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