yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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