All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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