come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
