i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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