You can't motorboat a personality
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I have feelings that need drinking.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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