doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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