Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize